LMH Complaint 8.E

Another part of this file note where Phil tries to make me sound strange and crazy is when he says-

“Miss Vannucci said that she was going back to her flat to eat the BLUE rodent bait.”

As it paints an image of me biting int hard, raw, blocks of BLUE poison.

As previously stated, what I had in my flat was poisoned porridge. Which is a very common item to use as suicide poison.

I probably did say I was going to eat the poison, and knowing the suicidal thoughts I had been having I probably added “Because that’s the only way its going to solve my rat infestation,” (as at this point we had already been told that rats and mice eat where they live, and that they weren’t living in my flat, so the chance of them eating the poison in my flat was low.) but I certainly never said that it was blue. This is an embellishment on Phil’s part.

There’s also no way I would have said that you should call the police as I was threating to harm myself because-
1. I don’t believe the police should be dealing with mentally ill people, unless they are a danger to others.
2. I actually did intent to kill myself after I left that meeting (and I will explain how I know this later) which meant I wouldn’t have wanted anybody looking for me.

Him saying I said this again suggests I am looking for attention, or trying to use threats of harming myself to get what I want.

I have tried to commit suicide twice before, for no other reason than I wanted to die.

I have an illness that has the highest rate of successful suicide attempts out of any other illness or person group.

I have an illness that I have seen doctors describe as making not in recovery suffers chronically suicidal.

If I try to kill myself again, it will be the result of my illness making me want to die, not because I am trying to get attention or manipulate anyone, and to suggest such is actually a common way people discriminate against people with borderline personality disorder.